Tips for Trailing Spouses (From Those Who’ve Been There)

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Living the trailing spouse life can be a bit of an adjustment. Not only are you living in another country, but if you’re anything like me you went from having most of your hours taken up by work to suddenly having all the time in the world. This newfound freedom can be both exciting and scary.

I reached out to the trailing spouse community to find out their best tips, tricks and strategies for living the trailing spouse life. Here’s what they suggest you do to ensure you’re not just surviving, but thriving abroad: Continue reading

What NOT to Say to a Trailing Spouse


Over the past several months I’ve been faced with a few questions and comments about my life choices. Most of them are basic questions, asked out of love, caring and curiosity, but then there are others that have just rubbed me the wrong way. From complete strangers giving me career and financial advice, to new acquaintances asking me personal questions that are really none of their business, I feel like I’ve heard it all.

And I knew I mustn’t be alone. My situations in Canada, Spain and England can’t be unique, so I reached out to other expats and trailing spouses (or love migrants as one referred to herself) to find out what questions and comments they get asked that hurt their feelings, made them feel judged, or just rubbed them the wrong way. I received a number of responses, but there were a few themes/comments/words that seemed to pop up over and over again.

So, without further ado, here’s what NOT to say to an expat or trailing spouse: Continue reading

Expat Update: Patience and Privilege

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Our first six weeks in England haven’t at all gone as I had planned. I thought life in England would be easier than in life in Spain for the simple fact that we spoke the language. But our time here has been anything but simple. Since we arrived (and even before) our days have been fraught with bureaucracy, hurdles, and more paperwork than I could have ever anticipated. Most disappointing has been the fact that I haven’t had a single chance to wear a fascinator, and I am really keen to wear a fascinator.

Last week, it all sort of hit me. The weather was cold and cloudy, my ovaries had taken me hostage, and I was tired of dealing with stuff. I was tired of overcoming hurdles only to encounter new ones and, oh-my-goodness, I was beyond tired of dealing with paperwork! So I stopped. I took a few days off to mull over where we’ve been and where we still have to go, and I decided to write a little rant about it.

So, without further ado, here is my expat update rant about privilege, patience and life lately. Continue reading